i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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