BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Girls should come with a carfax report
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
It's shark week go big or go home
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
My bed smells like the plague
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize
