So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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