just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
