You were right. It hurts to walk today.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
