Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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