Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize