butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize