Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
