Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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