Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
