Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I CAN MOONWALK!

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(517): View more from Michigan

he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.

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(404): View more from Georgia

I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day

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(519): View more from Ontario

You're going to love the baby's room.

(1-519): View more from Ontario

I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

The best part of last night is not remembering half of it

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