Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
