Quick, to the slutcave!
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
pop tarts are not kleenex
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize