what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Randomize
