why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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