Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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