remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
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all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
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Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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