similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
