I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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