She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
