I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
