Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize