I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
