Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
