he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize