Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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