If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
