Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero

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(716): View more from New York

Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen

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(804): View more from Virginia

Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.

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(361): View more from Texas

Did i throw a brick at someone last night?

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(206): View more from Washington

obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito

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(604): View more from British Columbia

This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.

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(506): View more from New Brunswick

On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?

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