I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize