Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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