im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
