names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
