I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Randomize
