I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Ladies don't puke and tell
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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