her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
