It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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