my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
