i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
