What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
