i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
