I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
