we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize