Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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