Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
