At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
