Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Randomize