They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Welp...herpes.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
