She went from zero to smokin in five shots
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
