It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
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The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
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We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
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