is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Just high enough for therapy.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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