I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
He told me they were just razor bumps!
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
